A week at the Beach

So, we just got back from a week in Emerald Isle, North Carolina. We went with Sue, George, John and Mary Tyler. It was a fantastic week. A bit of a long drive though... we broke it up into two days each way. Olive does fine for awhile, but after about four hours has pretty much had it with the car seat entirely and focuses her energies on screaming. After awhile you are ready to swerve into oncoming traffic, but then, thank god, you remember that there are graham crackers.

Olive loved the beach. She played in teh sand and went swimming; I dug her a hole near the water line so it would fill with water and make her own little pool to kick around in. When she wasn't eating the sand herself, she decided to share the love and add a handful or two to my tea. We went to the North Carolina Aquarium, which she also enjoyed tremedously. I was trying to get her to say "Echinoderm" the whole time.

The kid is getting so smart so fast it's really scary. Maybe it's just because I spent so much time with her last week that I'm more aware of it. So, now she can say "FEESH" and she knows what it is. She can blow kisses, and, as of today, figured out that if you blow on the pinwheel, it will spin. Kristen said she figured out the toy car today, pulling it back and then letting it go, all by herself. They were also playing Ker Plunk today (that game where you put sticks through the holes in a clear cylinder and try to keep marbles from falling through) and she picked up a stick and fed it through the tiny holes in the side. Now, that impressed me, because those are tiny. And, while we were on vacation, she crawled over to the bedroom door, climbed up against the wall, reached for the doorknob and tried to turn it. That freaked me out.

She is still not officially walking yet... she will walk if we hold her hands; Even if you hold just one, she does pretty well. I think she could probably stand up on her own, but hasn't really figured out that she can yet. She's really into rocking out now; she loves the rocking horse, the rocking chair, etc. etc. It's pretty amazing.

Things with me have been pretty good; I took some time this week to reassess my priorities. I have been so caught up with my work stuff that I have kind of distanced myself from my parenting responsibilities. Marc brought this to my attention. Um, yeah. Anyway, after feeling like the shittiest parent ever for a day or so, I decided to just go with it and try to do better rather than beating myself up about things. It's really hard though; you feel so insecure about being a "good" parent, and then when you get criticized or something stupid happens, you just beat yourself up even more for being a shitty parent. It's just hard to shake off. Insecurity breeds more insecurity, not progress. After a few days, I just decided to clean slate the whole thing. When I'm home, I am trying to focus more on her and less on trying to get a million things done in the 45 free minutes I have. But, that also means that if I don't get dinner made, someone else is going to have to do it. It's not even stuff around the house as it is work stuff. With my own little side business, there's always something to do, something to write up, something to file or organize. Marc's suggestion was that I do something for me instead; go to Yoga one night a week, something, so that my work isn't my home hobby. Otherwise, it just never ends. I am looking into taking a class at Clayworks this September; I think it will get me motivated. I want to make some ceramic forms for mosaics. I thin it will be good for me; Maybe he's right. It will give me another focus and I think it will be fun.

So, there we are. I will post a picture of Olive in the hermit crab photo op at the aquarium. More later, M